Won't you have a lump in your throat when in retrospect you see a year of your life gone to complete waste, some personal favourite stuff gone missing never to appear and a table you always enjoyed to work on gone forever. All this loss for absolutely nothing , just nothing.
This boiling of emotions and it's overflow is exactly what Othello goes through after he kills Desdemona and realizes the truth.
I think the worst thing in life is to trust somebody unconditionally. People are ready to sacrifice anything and everything for some sake but it hurts deep when people sabotage your sacrifices. But then, not being a Gandhian in my case people have to pay a hefty price .. I must admit here that if a victim of such type can forgive the culprit then he is just "GREAT". It will certainly take a long time for me to become that "GREAT".
And what's my punishment to such people ? Well simply, wrath for rest of the life. Infact complete banishment for some of those. Getting forgived has become too cheap these days. People claim that it's their mistake but when you see some matured people doing such things then definately it's not a mistake but a criminal act.
One thing anyone cannot revert is time. And it's such an emotional gammut to see you doing something else in history than what you actually did. The progression of your life hits a road block, for some they backtrace and for some they are in a state of helter skelter. If you are a happy go lucky kind of person then it's a lot easier to take such happenings in your stride. But if you are quite calculative , of a planner kind, then it's very difficult to come to terms.
Well, getting slaughtered for no mistake is such a depressing thing that it can just about change the course of your life. When you devote for the people you love and they backstab you it's such a hard thing to digest. And the biggest problem lies in mixing different contexts like say your personal and professional lives. Life is so much better when you keep them apart but as soon as they start intersecting it becomes very difficult. But yes there are instances when you need to mix them and i think personal life takes precedence here. And imagine when you get sabotaged in your personal life then how badly you are hit. You just have to pay dearly.
It's a very bitter feeling and leaves a bad taste in your mouth. It's as if the Spiderman I shot, when the rope Car and "MJ" moves down the 2 glasses of Spiderman. Salvage man ... Save your dreams ...
So to relate very closely with such a situation one needs to find the most depressing of the songs.
Here are a few which has helped me a lot :
1. " Yaad na jaye beete dino ki ... jake na aaye jo din ...." - *****
2. "Raha gardisho mein hardam .. mere ishq ka sitara ...." - *****
3. "Toote hue khwabone humko yeh sikhaya hain ...." - *****
So after enough pondering on such issues you must be feeling how saddist is this fellow. Yes i am very very disappointed but not out. There is just one way and that is to move ON ...
Again some songs of hope :
1. " Nazarana bheja kisine pyaar ka ....hain diwana jo bas tere ....." - Thanks a lot to Rajesh Roshan for this beauty.
2. " Tum jo mil gaye ho to yeh lagata hain ... ki jahan ... mil gaya ... " - RafiSaab at his best ...
Nothing is perfect and Life has started to paint it's colour on my Life's drawing board ...
